Be aware that helping others with self-harm may bring new feelings up for you as well. You might feel resentful towards the person, develop extreme sympathy for them, or become excessively frustrated. When you experience these feelings, remember to stay balanced and keep a check on your emotions so you can be a neutral, loving presence for them. [2] X Research source
If they are not ready to acknowledge the problem yet, accept that they may need more time. Still keep an eye on them and be as supportive in other ways as possible, letting them know that you care and are there for them. They will come to you when they are ready to talk about it. Never give your friend an ultimatum. Always be supportive and positive. [3] X Research source
You can also use this time to talk about how you release your emotions without telling them how to change them. This will offer them a suggestion of positive ways to express emotions that don’t involve cutting but that aren’t treated as aggressive suggestions to change their life. Although you want to show them that you empathize, you never want to join them in cutting yourself in order to let her know you know how they feel. This will only hurt you and reinforce their self-harm. [4] X Research source
It can also aggravate the cutting behavior, especially if they use cutting as a way to have more control over their life or body. [6] X Research source
Try to keep a close eye on your friend in case their behavior escalates. In this case, you may need to suggest professional help to get their self-harm under control. [7] X Research source
To help calm their mind, they can also try yoga, meditation, or tai chi. These exercises can help them get a new lease on life, with a fresh, energetic, confident approach that will help them not want to cut themselves. Exercise also releases endorphins into their body, which are the chemicals in the body that makes them feel good. [8] X Research source When a person cuts themselves, endorphins rush to the area of the cut and are released into the bloodstream, which cause feelings of relaxation, happiness, and relief. Exercise provides them with a positive way to release endorphins instead. [9] X Research source
You can help your friend realize they are full of accomplishments by sharing with them a list of their positive attributes and accomplishments.
Have your small pep talks at a location that is pleasant, peaceful, in the midst of nature, away from hustle and bustle, and private, where the chances of being bothered are minimal. If you can’t go somewhere in nature, try a quiet place in your apartment or house or a secluded study room at your local library. The exact location doesn’t matter as long as it’s a place where you can an honest, uninterrupted conversation. Give them ample time to talk to you. Give them the time they need and want. Do not push them into speeding things up and always choose a place and time that they are comfortable with.
Issuing ultimatums without assisting or supporting them in ways to find safe alternatives is not a wise option and can cause more harm than good.
Books also provide an opportunity to understand that there can be plenty of positive and acceptable coping strategies. Present them with books that are thought-provoking, such as those that will help them look within themselves and assess their personal predicament.
Don’t advise them to write specifically about cutting unless they go to a therapist or counselor. You never know what can of worms could open up, so suggesting your friend focus on a problematic behavior that could be compensating for that trauma is not a good idea unless they go to a professional for help. A journal can also help a psychologist, psychiatrist, or counselor learn about their condition before diagnosis and treatment. [12] X Research source
Sit with them as they move the objects out of their immediate area. If they aren’t ready to throw them away yet, have them put them on a high shelf or in a room across the house. This will give them more time to think about what they are doing before they do it, which may make them not want to cut themselves.
Be part of the process from start to finish. Take them shopping for the new items in the room and don’t leave them until the project is done. Help them enjoy the process of welcoming changes into their life.
If they love nature, go for a hike. If they love to paint, encourage them to paint. They can do anything creative, such as write a story, play an instrument, or draw a picture. They can also watch a movie or TV show, listen to music, play a game, or anything else they love to do. If you surround them with activities and things they like, they will be more likely to be distracted from their behavior and need to cut themselves. If they don’t go out much, encourage them to meet new people, develop contacts, and nurture relationships. This can improve self-confidence, self-esteem, and help them build trust in people.
The involvement of a mental health professional is vital if you are serious about the recovery of your loved one. There is always a stigma associated with seeking help from a mental health professional, but it is essential to convince your loved one to seek treatment. [14] X Research source If they are not ready for that, offer to help them research self-harm and triggers. There is an abundance of information on the internet about many topics, and self-harm is no different. Make sure you find information and literature from credible sources, such as psychological foundations or helpline websites. Some content can be misleading and could work against helping your friend or loved one get better.
They might be hesitant or unwilling to be a part of the support meant for people who cut themselves. To encourage them, you could accompany them to give them the strength and support they need to make that final step.
The professional interventionist has a major role to play in getting rid of the cutting behavior in the family’s loved one. Get a professional interventionist to arrange an intervention for the person cutting and their loved ones. You could also be one of the participants since you care about them as well. [17] X Research source
Your loved one might end up cutting in the wrong place, which can cause serious blood loss or accidental death. [18] X Research source [19] X Research source
In the case of children and adolescents, severe anemia can affect motor skills and mental faculties. They may have a poor attention span and become less alert and responsive. Adults with untreated anemia may develop heart-related problems and may even experience a stroke and cardiac conditions. Anemia may also impair cognitive powers.